Alex Cabot Was Drunk
by aolurker
Summary: I think the title says it all. UPDATE: added part 3 - Alex and Olivia finally get to go on their first date, woo. :
1. Part 1: Alex Cabot Was Drunk

**Title:** Alex Cabot Was Drunk**  
Disclaimer:** I do not own SVU or these characters (darn it!) nor am I making any money off them (darn it!). No infringement intended.**  
Fandom:** Law and Order: SVU**  
Pairing:** Alex/Olivia**  
Rating: ** T**  
Summary:** The title sort of says it all. Alex/Olivia**  
Notes:** I would love to be able to promise a continuation of this story, it was originally written with the intention of it being the first of at least several parts but I'm so easily distracted by shiny things and a couple ideas for, um, plotless stories have gone and popped into my head. So I may have to write those first. Time will tell.

**********

**Alex Cabot Was Drunk**

Alex Cabot was drunk.

Not completely shit-faced drunk, but on the other hand, yeah, pretty drunk.

And that was quite unusual, at least as far as anyone in the squad was aware. For this was the sixth time she'd come out with them for an after-work drink but the _first_ time she'd actually had a real drink.

And not just one.

Sure, those previous times she'd sipped at a glass of wine as everyone else downed a beer or two or three. But tonight? Tonight was different. She'd surprised everyone with her, "No, actually, I think I'll have a pint, thanks, Elliot," and surprised and delighted everyone even more (well, almost everyone) with her, "How about I get the next pitcher?"

Now, yet another pitcher or two later, the guys looked on amusedly, completely engrossed by and taken with this new side of their ADA as she recounted just-this-side-of scandalous stories and shared just-this-side-of off-color jokes, and as she tossed her head back to release full-throated laughs at the various detectives' own stories (stories that often came at the expense of one of their fellow detective's egos).

And she looked ready to go on all night.

But while the gang wanted to be game, the week had been long and hard and they were all on the cusp of exhaustion. Their spirits may have been willing but their bodies just weren't quite up for it. Elliot was the first to call it quits, downing the last swig in his glass and rising from the table. That was all the trigger required for everyone else to toss in the towel, as well.

As the rest of the group began to make their excuses and don their coats, Elliot managed to communicate with Olivia enough to know that she would see to it that the blonde got home safely that night. It was, after all, something she'd be more than capable of doing.

Because Olivia Benson was sober.

Stone cold sober at that. Which wasn't entirely usual. For Olivia was known to partake in a drink (or two) after work now and again. But not tonight. Tonight when everyone else was ordering a second round, she was pushing aside her mostly untouched first round and ordering a water.

And as Alex had all the guys doubled over with laughter throughout the evening, Olivia sat mostly silent, smiling on occasion and sipping that water. As the attorney seemingly innocently leaned into the detective every now and then in the booth, pressing their shoulders and thighs tightly together as the blonde's body was gripped with laughter, Olivia tried not to melt into the unexpected body contact, both loving and hating it at the same time. And as Alex's hand seemingly innocuously landed on Olivia's thigh as she slapped her palm in amusement Olivia gritted her teeth against the delicious torture.

On the one hand, the contact seemed to Olivia too frequent for it to be completely innocent and accidental. But on the other hand, given Alex's... diminished mental capacity ...Olivia knew she dare not read too much into it. For though she'd longed for such contact and more, though she had hoped, in fact planned, that she would _get_ such contact and more and get it tonight even... This? ...Well this was not how she had planned to get it.

No, this was not at all how she had planned for this night to go.

- - - - - -

When they got outside into the crisp night air, Olivia was content to hail a cab but Alex insisted on walking. Hooking her arm around one of Olivia's, Alex headed off in the direction of her apartment, once again the close contact, the press of Alex's body against hers a delicious torture for Olivia.

And Olivia battled with herself because of it; for it seemed more and more that this contact was not just happy tipsiness; but rather it was concerted and deliberate. And Olivia would be lying if she said she didn't love it. But she'd also be lying if she said she didn't hate it, too. Or at least fear it. For though she wanted it to be deliberate, just wanted it, period, she couldn't be certain of it. She couldn't be certain Alex would behave this way without the alcohol helping her along. Couldn't be certain Alex was certain. Or serious.

And she wanted--she needed--Alex to be both.

Through it all, however, Alex was oblivious to Olivia's internal battle, making her way down the sidewalk with a smile on her face and a lightness in her step. She chattered about how much fun that was and how they should do it more often, wavering only slightly every now and again, pressing tightly against Olivia who silently and valiantly helped prop her up and keep her walking a mostly straight line.

Fortunately, it wasn't long before they got to Alex's apartment building, Alex tossing a cheery "Hello, Brian!" to the night doorman.

"Ms. Cabot," Brian nodded his head. "Ma'am," he nodded his head again, this time at Olivia, and this time with a slight frown on his face.

Olivia smiled back tightly, knowing exactly what this must look like and figuring by 'Brian's' expression, it hadn't occurred that often, if ever, before. Olivia was a little ashamed at how happy that made her feel but didn't want to dwell on it, just thankful that there was an elevator waiting, and also thankful that there was another occupant in the elevator.

For the glances and smiles Alex sent her way on the ride up were enough to get Olivia's heart beating harder and were even further evidence that Alex's actions tonight were, in fact, on purpose, her intentions becoming more obvious with each fleeting look. And that's why Olivia was grateful for the elevator's other occupant; for it bought her just a little more time; time to girded herself against what was becoming more and more inevitable: Alex trying something, making an advance, offering something Olivia desperately wanted...

...and Olivia having to find the strength and the reserves to turn it down.

- - - - - -

And, as it turned out, Olivia was right; it wasn't long before the inevitable came to pass.

The elevator dinged their arrival at Alex's floor and the two women walked out, traversing the several feet down the hall to Alex's apartment door where Alex stopped and then turned toward Olivia. "I thought I'd make it inside but, God, I've been dying all night to do this and I just can't wait any longer." The blonde took a step towards the detective then and leaned in, finally and utterly and completely removing all doubt about her behavior throughout the evening.

And even though she knew it was coming, had been preparing, it was just as Olivia had expected: it put all her strength and reserves to the test. But though it was hard, so very hard to turn away, turn away she did. "Alex, no. No," Olivia said quietly, gathering her restraint and managing to avoid the kiss Alex had attempted by turning her head down and to the side and using her two hands to gently grip Alex's shoulders and put a little distance between herself and the blonde.

Alex, far from being hurt by the gesture and far from being deterred, closed that distance again, tilting her head to the side slightly and giving Olivia a small smile as she gazed at her with glazed eyes, "I've seen the way you look at me, Detective. I've seen it at work, in my office, in the squad room, at the bar after work... I've seen it. And I know what that look means," Alex took another slightly unsteady step forward still looking Olivia in the eye, "And now you're _honestly_ going to tell me you don't want to kiss me?"

Alex assessment was all too accurate and her proximity and obvious willingness had Olivia's head spinning and her body aching. But the whiff of alcohol cleared Olivia's head and she again gently eased the blonde away and exhaled, "I'm honestly going to tell you that I don't want to kiss you like this."

"Like what? Like one door away from an apartment and a bed where we can do a whole lot more than kissing?" Alex inched in again, smiling suggestively, biting her bottom lip.

Olivia nearly groaned through clenched teeth and didn't bother trying to push the attorney away. And though her voice was quiet, it was nevertheless firm, as were her words, "Like you drunk, Alex," she looked into Alex's eyes, almost pleadingly, "Not like this."

Alex finally relented and stepped away, jutting out her bottom lip slightly in a pout and looking at Olivia with the most adorable forlorn expression. "But that was the whole point of me being drunk," she complained and then went back to pouting.

Olivia frowned, "What was the whole point?"

"I purposely got drunk," Alex said, not looking at Olivia but rather looking at her hand as she ran her fingers along the triangle of Olivia's shirt collar, "So I'd finally have the courage to make a move on you," she finished quietly.

At that Olivia took a full step backwards and started honestly laughing, running a hand through her hair and over her face, the tension and frustration that had been building in her all night finally breaking as the ironic humor of it all hit her.

But Alex didn't see what was so funny, "Why are you laughing at me?" she demanded.

Olivia looked at the blonde and could see that she was genuinely hurt this time and quickly spoke to reassure her. "I'm sorry, Alex. I'm not laughing at you, I promise," Olivia explained, "I'm laughing at the situation."

"What's so funny about the situation?" Alex managed, only a slight slur in her words.

"You purposefully getting drunk tonight so you could make a move on me and me purposefully staying sober tonight so that I could make a move on you."

Alex blinked several times, trying, trying to piece together and make sense of all the information contained in that statement. Finally, she realized the salient point. Her eyes widened, "You were going to make a move on me tonight?"

Olivia nodded, sadly, ruefully, regretfully.

Alex was silent again, processing. Then, "Why did you need to be sober to do that?"

"Because," Olivia inhaled deeply and then exhaled in a rush, "I didn't want you to think I was doing what I was doing and saying what I was saying because I was drunk. I wanted you to know it was me and not the alcohol talking."

"Oh." Alex's alcohol clouded mind mulled over this newest information. Suddenly her face lit up as she seemed to make a connection, "Well, then, go ahead. You're sober, so I'll know it's not the alcohol!" Alex gave her a lopsided hopeful grin. "So, come on, give me your best move, Detective."

With the tension of the evening broken and the truth finally out there between them, Olivia couldn't help but laugh further at their situation and also at Alex's expression and at the fact that Alex's mind still seemed to be plotting and scheming as it always did, albeit at a slightly slower rate than normal. And she regretted greatly having to turn the blonde down yet again, "I know I'm sober, but you're not, remember?"

"But this isn't about me," Alex reasoned, trying her best cross-examination voice, but not quite succeeding given it's slow cadence and slight slur.

Olivia knew better than to get into a debate with the blonde. Even when drunk Alex could probably still argue circles around her. So she settled on changing the topic, looking around at their surroundings as they still stood in the hall, then back at Alex, "Why don't we go inside?"

Alex cocked an eyebrow at her, "Ooo, I thought you'd never ask." Alex was trying to be smooth as she reached into her purse in search of her keys while still holding Olivia's gaze, only to start fumbling through it. And fumbling some more. And more. Finally Olivia reached over and took the purse from her. One look inside and she located the keys. Flipping through them she took a guess as to which one was Alex's apartment key and slipped it into the lock.

When it slid smoothly in, Alex, who had inched closer once again and started trying to nuzzle her nose against Olivia's cheek, and rub her body along Olivia's side, hummed, the double entendre not lost on Olivia who shivered at the hum in her ear and the once again not unwelcome body contact.

Though Olivia knew she couldn't and wouldn't let anything happen tonight, it was apparent that Alex hadn't yet reach that same conclusion, and the blonde certainly wasn't going to make it easy on the detective. So Olivia turned the door handle and opened the door quickly, stepping in and once again away from the determined and so very tempting attorney.

- - - - - -

It was not surprising to Olivia but it was much to both her dismay and amusement that once they had entered the apartment and the door was shut behind them, Alex picked up exactly where they had left off in the hall, "Alright, we're inside now, Detective. So give me your best move, show me what you got," Alex gave her smile which was probably supposed to be sly or sexy but ended up just sort of goofy. "I promise to be impressed and wooed and agree to whatever you suggest."

Olivia took a deep breath and shook her head a little amusedly and a little regretfully before answering Alex's challenge with a question and another rueful half-smile, "That's exactly the problem, now, isn't it?"

"What's exactly the problem?"

"You. Agreeing to anything. How can I know it's you and not the alcohol?"

Alex paused for a moment, thinking, before taking another step towards the detective and answering, "What if I cross-my-heart _promise_ it's not the alcohol?" Alex said this with utter seriousness as if this were an truly fantastic idea and a completely satisfactory solution.

Olivia once again couldn't help but chuckle at the utter cuteness of the suggestion and of Alex stating the suggestion in the way she had, "'Cross your heart promise'? Really? That's your answer?" the detective laughed as she avoided the wandering hands of the attorney once more.

"Mhm," Alex's smile broadened as she actually crossed her heart with her hand then moved in, or tried to, on Olivia once more.

Olivia once again couldn't keep from chuckling even more at the playful antics of an intoxicated and rather determined Alex, warding the attorney off one more time, this time with an alternate suggestion. "Why don't instead we just sit and talk for a bit?" Olivia backed up that suggestion by taking Alex gently by the elbow and leading her further into the apartment.

- - - - - -

Olivia guided Alex to her couch and though she tried to just ease Alex down onto it, Alex's unsteadyness--or perhaps grabbiness would be a better term--also brought her down onto the couch as well, right next to, side by side, and body to body with the attorney.

There was just a moment of surprised awkwardness as they looked at each other, so close, Olivia almost getting lost in Alex's eyes, before Alex smiled again, "Mmmmm, I like your idea of talking."

Her voice managed to shake Olivia from her dangerous reverie. She cleared her throat and began extricating herself from the attorney, "I think I'm going to make some coffee."

"Coffee," Alex repeated, "Coffee is good." Olivia started to get up, thankful that Alex appeared distracted by the idea of coffee enough that she didn't try to keep Olivia from rising. But just as she got to her feet Alex asked abruptly and seemingly out of no where, "Do you have any beer?"

Olivia blinked several times down at the blonde then frowned, her head cocked slightly to the side. "We're at your apartment, Alex, not mine."

Alex also blinked several times then responded, "Ohh, yeah. I don't have any beer. ... But I have wine!" Her face lit up as she remembered this.

Olivia chuckled again and knelt to help Alex out of her shoes so she could lift her feet onto the sofa, getting the attorney comfortable and settled in, "I think you've had enough for tonight, Alex."

"The wine isn't for me, silly!" Alex gave Olivia a playful swat, "It's for you."

Olivia smiled patronizingly at the inebriated attorney, "Thank you but I'm fine."

"C'mon Olivia. I'll have coffee. You have wine. I'll sober up. You'll get tipsy. And we'll meet somewhere in the middle. Then you'll let us..." she waggled her eyebrows, or at least tried, finer motor skills were not her strong suit right now, "...Youuuu knoooow," she tried to waggle her eyebrows again.

The statement, the logic behind it despite Alex's intoxicated state, Alex's facial expressions, just sent Olivia into laughter one more time, she couldn't help it. "You are incorrigible tonight, you know that? But, I think it's best that we meet fully on my side of the sobriety line and not in the middle...though that was a good try."

"Take the deal, Detective. If you don't, someone else here will." Alex put on her best take-it-or-leave-it expression.

Olivia looked around the empty apartment. "Like who?"

Alex gave her a petulant look, annoyed Olivia had recognized her last statement as a bluff and not an actual threat, annoyed that Olivia had called her bluff, and too drunk to realize just how obvious a bluff it was.

Olivia laughed again at the expression. "I'm going to go make some coffee."

- - - - - -

After yelling back and forth from kitchen to living room, asking for where this and that were stored, Olivia finally managed to brew a couple cups of coffee. But when she returned to the living room 15 minutes later, two steaming mugs in hand, she really wasn't surprised to find the blonde mostly laying down with her head on the arm of the couch and her eyes closed, for all intents and purposes asleep, the alcohol, the long week, and her efforts with Olivia having finally caught up to her.

Olivia's heart clenched at the sight and she set the mugs down, the amusement from earlier now also having faded in the presence of Alex's sleeping form. She allowed herself to study the attorney's face, something she wasn't afforded the opportunity to do in their normal lives. It was beautiful, so very beautiful and even more so at peace, like it was now. Lax in sleep, hair falling partially over it, she looked younger. Or perhaps it was just that she looked more innocent.

God how easy it would have been...would still be...to just give in to her.

But before Olivia's thoughts got away from her, she placed a hand on Alex's shoulder and shook her gently. When clouded eyes opened, Olivia whispered, "Come on, you don't want to sleep here." She helped the blonde up and was relieved when Alex didn't make any further verbal of physical advances, seemingly finally spent and content on going to bed. Olivia got her to the bedroom and pointed her to the bathroom. Before Alex closed the door, Olivia grabbed what she assumed were Alex's night clothes off her bed and handed them to the attorney, hoping beyond hope that she would put them on so Olivia didn't have to help with that.

Her hopes were answered when the bathroom door opened and Alex came wandering out in her pajamas, blindly headed towards the bed. Olivia turned down the sheets and helped Alex in without a word. She was about to leave when Alex reached out a hand and grabbed Olivia's arm. "Don't go."

Olivia sat down on the edge of the mattress, indulging herself a little by moving a piece of hair from Alex's eyes, "What do you need, sweetie?"

"I need you to stay. Please?"

Olivia exhaled, almost pained, "Alex, I... I really don't think that's a good idea."

"No, no that's not what I mean," Alex shook her head on the pillow. "I just... I wasn't expecting to go to sleep alone tonight. All by myself. I don't want to," she looked up at Olivia with longing, pleading eyes, eyes that seemed clearer and surer and more sober than they had all night, "Please don't make me," she finished on a whisper.

Such a simple request. The simple human desire to not fall asleep alone.

That's all Alex was asking of her. Pure. Vulnerable. Innocent.

Olivia was sure there wasn't a person in the world who could have resisted such a request, such a plea. And she certainly wasn't someone who could.

So she swallowed hard, and nodded. She went to the door to turn the light out, then climbed in to bed behind Alex, making sure to stay in her clothes and above the blankets. Her resistance too frayed to push any further than that. Fortunately, Alex didn't seem to mind.

In fact, Olivia was pretty sure the attorney was asleep only seconds after Olivia spooned up behind her and draped an arm over her. The blonde had let out a sigh that can only be described as contented, and all the tension left her body as she pressed and fit perfectly into the curves and form of Olivia.

The detective knew she probably shouldn't but she remained for long minutes after the attorney had fallen asleep. Listening to Alex breathe, letting herself dream about this being real. Being afraid that it could be real. Being more afraid that it wasn't. That when sobriety and the light of day hit, Alex would change her mind and it would vanish.

But that was for tomorrow.

For tonight, Olivia indulged for just a few minutes longer, then finally roused herself and rose from the bed, careful not to disturb the sleeping attorney. She returned to the living room, having found a pillow and extra blanket in Alex's closet. Then laying herself down on the same couch she'd moved Alex from 30 minutes earlier, she fell asleep herself, her last thoughts lingering on what might have been, and on what might be.


	2. Part 2: Alex Cabot Was Hungover

**Title:** Alex Cabot Was Hung Over**  
Disclaimer:** I do not own SVU or these characters (darn it!) nor am I making any money off them (darn it!). No infringement intended.**  
Fandom:** Law and Order: SVU**  
Pairing:** Alex/Olivia**  
Rating: ** T/PG-13**  
Summary:** What happens the morning after Alex Cabot Was Drunk?**  
Notes:** At long last, a sequel. If you haven't noticed, I don't do many of these, tending to shy away from them, always afraid they not only won't live up to the promise of the original but will also detract from it. But, this story was never far from my mind so I finally decided to just write it already!

**Alex Cabot Was Hung Over**

Alex Cabot was hung over. Now, it wasn't the worst hangover she'd ever had...

She cracked open an eyelid, only to immediately shut it again with a groan.

...but on the other than, yeah, it was pretty bad.

She tried again, cracking the other eye open this time. But just as before, she immediately closed it again as another sound of displeasure escaped her; her eyes, or more specifically her head, not at all appreciating the morning light filtering through the blinds.

She lay as still as possible on the bed for several minutes longer, not even trying to remember yet what had gotten her into this condition (though part of her knew she wouldn't like it when she _did_ finally remember), but instead just letting her eyes adjust to the light levels through her closed lids and getting herself psyched up to give opening those eyes one more go. And when she did give it that one more go, she was finally met with a little success, managing to keep her eyes slitted open, the pain in her forehead mercifully a little less stabbing than minutes before.

So, with this first victory under her belt, she proceeded to slowly, carefully, cringing and groaning the entire time, toss and kick the covers off her body and then gingerly get herself into a mostly sitting position. She paused again, taking stock. Then after a moment or two, having decided her head wasn't going to explode and she wasn't going to puke, she placed her feet on the floor. She paused again, this time closing her eyes and inhaling a deep breath, preparing for her next move. But just as she opened her eyes again, just as she was about to push herself off the bed, she paused yet again, for that's when she noticed for the first time the glass of water and two Advil sitting on her bedside table.

She squinted at the objects.

And squinted at them some more. For, to be honest, she wasn't completely sure if they were real. And even if they were real, she wasn't _at all_ sure how they'd gotten there. Then again, there were a lot of things she wasn't at all sure about when it came to last night.

She tentatively reached out and her fingers wrapped around the two pills, proving at least that she wasn't just seeing things. And so while the slowly awakening part of her brain was trying to supply memories and possibilities of how those pills had gotten there and who had put them there and when and why and how, the pounding in her head insisted it really didn't matter at the moment. She as quickly as possible (which admittedly wasn't all that quick) popped the pills into her mouth and washed them down with the full glass of water, the tipping back of her head momentarily causing a bit of nausea. She put the glass back down and took another moment to settle her stomach and body.

Then still squinting and her head still pounding, she stumbled to the bathroom, each step and each moment bringing her even more and more awake. And despite her best efforts to ward off actually thinking about why she was hung over, each further step of wakefulness brought more and more memories of the night before to the surface...

_...drinks with the gang; lots and lots of drinks. Way too many as it turns out. And with Olivia sitting beside her the whole evening..._

And with each memory, the pounding in her head somehow seemed to get worse.

_...leaving the bar with Olivia; Olivia walking her home... Were we arm in arm?..._

And the pit in her stomach also somehow seemed to get worse. Consciously she didn't know why, not yet. But her subconscious knew.

_...Olivia coming to her apartment door; using the key to get in... Did the detective come inside? Or did she leave as soon as she saw Alex was safely in?..._

Alex tried to put answers to these questions, tried to remember the sequence of events as she entered the bathroom. And though she didn't dare turn on the bright lights, there was enough illumination for her to catch a glimpse of herself in the mirror. And what a sight. The red streaking through her eyes, the circles under them, the remnants of yesterday's makeup she'd never washed off, the complete mess that was her hair...

And it was then, right then, adding insult to injury, that she remembered.

_...Coming on to Olivia. Coming on strongly. Coming on repeatedly. But most dishearteningly and most importantly, Olivia turning her down. Firmly. And, yes, repeatedly._

Alex groaned again and covered her face with both hands, the now cascading memories of her behavior and of the events from the night before causing a sudden swell of embarrassment compounded with disappointment, two emotions that did nothing to alleviate or assuage any of the physical symptoms she was already experiencing, quite the opposite, in fact.

Oh, god. Oh god, what had she done? What had she done?

She kept her face buried in her hands as she repeated the question over and over in her mind, not realizing that the self-chastising and self-berating she was now engaging in was preventing her from remembering or fully realizing _why_ Olivia had turned her down; remembering only _that_ Olivia had turned her down. And done so more than once.

Alex finally lowered her hands only to groan yet again. She _knew_ she shouldn't have said anything. She knew she shouldn't have let herself get so drunk that she finally _would_ say something. Her mind kept replaying the number of times she propositioned Olivia, focusing on nothing else but her own actions from the night before. How could she ever work with the detective again? How could she even ever look her in the eye again or even ever be in the same room with her again? And, god, and how could she have been so wrong and so off track about how she thought Olivia felt about her?

What a nightmare.

As she finished up in the bathroom, she really wanted nothing more than to go back to bed, bury herself under the covers and sleep until the next ice age. Or maybe, maybe she could crawl under it and plot with the boogieman that lived there their joint escape to Canada to live out their days secluded from the rest of the world so she'd never have to think about or face up to last night ever again.

But despite how terribly Alex felt physically not to mention how horribly she felt mentally and emotionally, she knew she nevertheless had to go face the day. For, it was Saturday. And she was meeting Serena for lunch. Alex rolled her eyes at herself when she remembered further that in her more optimistic moments yesterday, she'd hoped to bring Olivia along with her. You know, sort of show her off, sort of brag. She then immediately winced, both at the pain the eye rolling had caused in her eye sockets but also at the prospect of having to explain to Serena why she was so hung over in the first place. Great. Juuuust great.

Alex pulled on a robe and pulled open the bathroom door, leaving her bedroom and slowly making her way down the short hall towards the kitchen and towards the smell of coffee.

Wait, what...? The smell of coffee? Why is there a smell of coffee coming from the kitchen? This question truly had Alex stumped, but only for two more steps. For after those two steps she had her answer. And she groaned for what seemed like the millionth time that morning.

Because oh, yes, this day had hardly even started but it just kept getting better and better.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

For there was the one person, the one single person in the entire world she didn't think she could ever face again: Olivia, calming sitting at the attorney's small dining room table, reading the morning paper and sipping from a mug of steaming fluid that was, no doubt, the coffee Alex had been smelling.

When the detective saw Alex pad into the room, she couldn't help it, it wasn't anything she had control over when it came to seeing the attorney: her face lit up, her eyes opened just a little wider and her lips transformed into a small, sympathetic, yet somehow still brilliant smile. "Good morning," her voice was quiet, gentle, almost a whisper, quite aware that anything above that would probably not be particularly welcome at this point.

Despite the fact that both the verbal and non-verbal greeting were warmer and more welcoming than Alex would have expected, she really didn't realize that, not on a conscious level at least, and so the options of going back to bed or crawling under it seemed only more appealing to Alex. Because, I mean, come on, what the hell was she doing here? Really. And why was she being all smiley like that? And how did she get back into the apartment this morning? ...Or had she never left? ...And if not, why not?

Ah, crap.

With her mind roiling with these questions, with her foggy memory searching once again for their answers, and with the same self-chastising embarrassment that had gripped her in the bathroom earlier, only even now more pronounced, Alex really wasn't up for small talk. But nor was she up for walking back to the bedroom, walking straight out the front door, or going straight out a window, though these were all options she considered. So, with few other choices, she gingerly sat herself down in a chair across from the detective, and without responding to Olivia's greeting, folded her arms on the table in front of her and buried her head and face in them with another groan.

Olivia couldn't help but chuckle a little at Alex's mostly non-verbal but definitely telling body language, Alex's obvious physical distress eliciting mild amusement in the detective, but also eliciting sympathy, as well. And thankfully, both acted to bring a modicum of relief to the detective's somewhat rattled nerves. For Alex wasn't the only one who had been battling roiling questions and emotions that morning. Olivia, too, had been struggling with her own since the moment she'd awakened hours before.

Would Alex even remember last night? Would she regret it? Did the attorney mean any of it? Or was all really just the alcohol? And the hardest question of them all: did Olivia really want to know? That is, should she stay that morning and find out? Or should she quietly slip away before Alex awoke and escape the answer?

Part of her, a fairly large part of her, after checking on the sleeping attorney and leaving the items on the bedside table, had definitely wanted to leave, had wanted, really, to avoid asking Alex whether she had been serious or not for as long as possible because the longer she avoided asking, the longer she could avoid a disappointing answer.

But another part of her, the part of her that was concerned enough to sleep on the couch in the first place, the part of her that had remained sober the night before for this precise reason and to ask this very question, and the part of her that remembered the look in Alex's eyes when the attorney had asked to be held before falling asleep last night, knew that this opportunity, this morning, it might be now or never.

And while facing Alex and getting a definitive answer was scary, the prospect of 'never' seemed far scarier.

So Olivia had stayed, and even in those first few seconds after Alex had appeared, Olivia was already beginning to think that she'd made the right decision. Because now, faced with Alex, or perhaps more particularly faced with Alex in this condition, it really didn't seem all that scary any more. The detective was certain there were only a handful of people that had ever been allowed to see the ever so prim and proper attorney in such a completely _not_ prim and proper condition, and Olivia felt probably a little too happy and honored to be one of that handful.

Nevertheless, she still didn't quite know how to proceed. So, not knowing what else to ask, Olivia just went with the first thing that popped into her head, "Did you take the Advil and drink the water I left you?"

Ah. So that at least answered that question. In response, Alex still didn't speak and still didn't lift her head but she did nod, kind of.

Olivia smiled again in mild amusement as she silently rose from her chair and went to the kitchen to pour another cup of coffee, adding cream and sugar to it exactly how she knew Alex liked it. She then returned to the dining room and, still silently, set the hot mug in front of the still bent head of the attorney before retaking her own seat. Olivia then bit her tongue, trying to give Alex time, trying to give her space, trying not to fuss too much, trying not to take advantage too much of Alex's condition, trying not to be too amused by it, trying to imagine herself in Alex's position, and all the while still trying to keep her own nerves settled. So as calmly and patiently as possible she simply lifted her own mug to her lips and took a small sip.

Finally, after what seemed like forever to the detective, but was barely even a minute, Olivia heard garbled and raspy sounds that might have been words coming from Alex's direction.

Olivia set her mug down and leaned forward, getting a little closer to Alex's head. "What was that, sweetie?" she asked quietly, not even realizing the unconscious use of the term of endearment as she strained to hear the muffled response.

"Why are you here?" Alex managed to rasp out a second time, her current physical and emotional condition causing her to be perhaps a little more blunt than she normally would be.

But Olivia didn't mind. It was, after all, a reasonable question, Olivia supposed. For, again, she really had no idea how much Alex remembered and how much she didn't. And though the detective was a little more at ease than she had been when she first woke up, she didn't want to give too much away just yet nor did she want to press too hard. So, like the skilled interrogator that she is, she sidestepped the question by turning it back around to the attorney, "As opposed to where?"

Alex sighed. "I don't know. Maybe..." one of Alex's hands lifted and made a circular gesture, "Maybe somewhere not here." Alex's voice was still raspy and gravelly and by her answer Olivia could tell that not only was the attorney's body not in the best of shape, her mind was also working at far, far less than capacity.

Olivia smiled, becoming more amused and more and more at ease by the minute despite herself and the situation. So she took another sip of coffee before volleying back quietly but determinedly, pushing a little further, probing Alex's memory and feelings a little deeper, "And what's wrong with here?"

"What's wrong with *not* here?" Alex whined. Yes, whined.

And this time Olivia had to hold herself back from chuckling, for it really was just so incredibly rare for Alex to be so completely inept in a verbal spar and... and well, it was really hard not to press the advantage a little, to have a little fun with it, and tease the attorney a bit for it. However, Olivia knew there were still a few too many unanswered questions left to go down that route, at least right now.

So Olivia shook her head slightly and inhaled deeply, refocusing her thoughts and letting Alex off the hook, at least a little, finally answering the question she had sidestepped earlier, and answering it honestly and genuinely. Mostly, at least. "I wanted to make sure you were okay this morning."

Like the smile Olivia had given her earlier, the detective's sweet and caring response registered on some level of Alex's brain but not on all levels, not yet, and so though it had somewhat of a calming affect, it couldn't and didn't fully mitigate the attorney's still roiling emotions and uncertainties. Emotions and uncertainties she finally gave voice to, "And to witness my humiliation?"

Aha.

With that response from Alex, Olivia got an answer to at least one of the unanswered questions: Alex remembered at least her own part of the previous evening, for why else would she be embarrassed? But now came the hard part: figuring out how the attorney felt about it.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

The detective swallowed hard and took a deep breath. She removed one of her hands from her coffee mug and inched it across the table top such that she could brush just the tips of her fingers lightly back and forth against one of Alex's still folded arms. It was a small but meaningful gesture, a hint at her own feelings on the matter as well as a physical manifestation of the intimacy of her next question, a question which she asked quietly, tenderly, and with just a tiny amount of lingering trepidation, "Were you hoping we would just pretend last night never happened?"

Alex felt the soothing and reassuring touch against her skin and heard the gentleness in Olivia's voice, and once again it registered with her on some level. And while she didn't recognize it consciously, or fully understand it, she felt innately comforted by it. And it was perhaps even that small amount of comfort which allowed her, consciously or not, to answer a little resignedly, yes, but also with unexpected honesty and even a hint of self-deprecating humor, "Actually, yes," Alex sighed, "If you must know, I was hoping to escape to Canada with the boogieman under my bed so I'd never have to face last night ever again."

Despite her best efforts, Olivia's face showed her amusement one more time, this time at Alex's rather unexpected answer, or at least at the unexpected length and form of that answer. And with her amusement and with having been caught just a little off guard and with also feeling the same innate comfort inside herself that mere contact with Olivia had brought Alex, Olivia just went with it, the question out of her mouth before she could stop it, "You have a boogieman under your bed?"

Alex finally, finally lifted her head at that question, squinting against the light and against her continued headache as she peered at Olivia, "Doesn't everyone?" she asked so very earnestly.

Olivia, not even really realizing that she was doing it, continued with the banter, easy and light conversation being something both women fell into so very easily and so very naturally with each other. The detective shook her head, "My boogieman lives in the closet."

Alex frowned in the most adorable way, especially coupled with what came out of her mouth next, "Your boogieman is gay?"

Olivia almost burst out laughing and had to fight off the strongest urge to pull Alex up out of her chair and kiss her senseless, the woman was just that adorable and irresistible, even, or perhaps especially, when saying the silliest things while completely hung over and with uncertainty hanging over both of them. But it was that uncertainty that tempered Olivia's reaction as she settled on a quiet chuckle and a small shaking of her head, truly wondering how in the heck the conversation had veered this far off track, and also knowing she had to get it back _on_ track. She took a breath. "Why are we talking about boogiemen?"

Alex shrugged, the action causing another unexpected lance of pain and another wince. She reached for her coffee mug, "You started it," she replied almost childishly.

Olivia frowned, "No, I didn't."

Alex took a sip of the strong brown liquid in the mug in front of her, reviewing the conversation in her mind. "Oh, yeah," she finally conceded then ran a hand through her tousled hair. "Which I guess just brings us back around to you being here to witness my humiliation," Alex put both elbows on the table then and dug a thumb into either of her eyes.

Olivia hadn't addressed the emotion the first time Alex had said it, but this was now the second time Alex had mentioned it, and Olivia still needed to know, still had one question left unanswered. "Why humiliation?" Olivia asked softly.

Alex cracked one eye open to glare at the detective. As if Olivia didn't know. Alex let the eye close and pushed her thumb into it once again. Fine. Since Olivia seemed determined to press the issue, and since Olivia seemed to want her to spell it out, then fine, she'd spell it out, this whole situation couldn't get much worse than it already was after all, right? "Oh, I don't know," Alex began matter-of-factly, "Perhaps because I not only told you how I felt about you but I was also so..." she trailed off, suddenly realizing as she tried to figure out exactly how to describe her behavior without even furthering her humiliation that, actually, yeah it could get worse.

But Olivia was oblivious to Alex's quandary. In fact, she had hardly even realized that Alex had stopped speaking, her mind was still completely focused and caught on the most, the one, the _only_ important thing in Alex's last statement, the answer to the final question: It. Was. Real.

The things the attorney had said last night, the things she had done, they represented how Alex _felt_. How she _really_ felt. It _wasn't_ just the alcohol talking. It was Alex talking. It was really Alex talking. It was real.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Relief flooded through Olivia, and her whole body seemed to charge, her whole attitude seemed to change. All traces of nervousness and fear fled, replaced instantly by a wave of giddiness and euphoria, emotions usually so foreign to the detective.

"So... Ugh!"

Alex's words, or rather her continued frustration and struggle to come up with words finally brought Olivia out of her haze of revelation and excitement. She looked at Alex in her disheveled state and diminished capacity a little differently now. Now she looked at her far more mischievously, far more impishly. For all the humor and amusement and teasing that she'd been fighting to reign in all morning, well there was nothing to contain it any more, there was nothing and there was no reason to hold it back. And after what Alex had put her through last night, why _not_ have a little fun with it now? So, much, much more playful than just moments before, Olivia helpfully suggested an end to Alex's sentence, "'Forward'?"

Alex's jaw clenched and she scrunched her eyes shut a little tighter but didn't say anything.

"Or perhaps the word you were looking for was 'persistent'." Olivia once again helpfully supplied.

Alex sighed.

But Olivia was just getting started. She looked up and tapped her lip as if she were thinking, considering, "No, no, that's not quite right... I think maybe it was more like... 'frisky'."

At that Alex groaned, because, yes, again yes, it was turning out that it could get much worse.

And Olivia grinned. But she also kept on going, Alex's sound of distress not causing her to ease up in the least, "Or you could probably go with 'horny.'"

Alex flopped her head back down into her folded arms, burying her face again and groaning again, "Oh, god," was all Alex could manage to moan.

"Oh! I know!" Olivia waggled her eyebrows even through Alex wasn't looking and couldn't see her, "'"Lustful'!" The detective was on a merciless roll now, "Hell, I'd say down right 'randy'," Olivia drew out the leading 'r' and 'a', clearly and obviously teasing the blonde at this point and also clearly and obviously thoroughly enjoying it.

"Yes, okay, please stop. Please, yes, all of those things," Alex's muffled pleas and confession could barely be heard though her meaning was obvious. But despite her protestations, in reality she was actually rather surprised that though she was still a little embarrassed, yes, she found that she really didn't feel humiliation, not any more at least. Olivia's earlier touch had helped, but just as much as that the detective's teasing actually served to put her at ease; it made her feel relaxed knowing Olivia was relaxed; it made her feel better knowing Olivia was still felt confident enough to tease and joke about the whole thing. Still. Despite the teasing and despite the good feelings that seemed to be flowing now, Alex knew she needed to apologize.

"Yes," Alex repeated one more time and lifted her head, but quickly covered her face in both hands, "And I'm sooooo embarrassed," she said through her hands before dropping them so she could look at Olivia, still squinting just slightly, "My behavior was horrible, Olivia, and I am so, so sorry."

Olivia was still amused and was still having fun, probably too much fun, at Alex's expense at this point, but with Alex's sincere apology, the detective also knew it was time to let Alex in on a key part of last night that the attorney seemed to have overlooked. She gently put a hand on top of one of Alex's, absently rubbing her thumb across it as she asked quietly and seriously now, dropping all teasing from her voice, "Do you remember what condition I was in last night?"

Alex was trying to control the fluttering in her stomach Olivia's renewed touch caused and was trying not to get her hopes up too much as to what it might mean; so many hints were starting to coalesce in her mind but something, something critical, remained elusive and just out of reach. She rubbed the fingers of her free hand across her forehead, then answered Olivia's question, "Yes, you were annoyingly sober last night. Just like you're annoyingly _not_ hung over this morning."

Olivia grinned at Alex's deadpan answer and the apparent return of at least some of Alex's trademark feistiness, but she stayed focused on last night and on the task at hand, "Yes, I was." She then bent and tilted her head in a bid to recapture Alex's eyes as she asked still quietly, still seriously, "Do you remember *why* I was sober?"

Alex looked away again, still rubbing her forehead, searching her foggy memory, "You were sober because..." Alex thought back, really trying to remember, "Because..." searching for that elusive piece, "Because..." and then all of a sudden, just like that, the memories came back in a flash and all the pieces of last night and of this morning fell into place. Her eyes darted back up to Olivia's and she ignored the resulting pain in her head in order to continue looking directly into Olivia's dark but so very open gaze, a new realization and with it new emotions and sensations flooding her, just as they had flooded Olivia minutes earlier.

Olivia answered the look she saw in Alex's eyes with a small smile, a small nod, and a slight squeeze of Alex's hand, wordlessly confirming to Alex that what she thought she was remembering was, in fact, truth. Olivia then swallowed hard and spoke again, but this time with both of them more on the same page, "So," Olivia continued to look directly in Alex's eyes, "Be embarrassed if you want or if you must, but please don't be sorry. There's no reason to be sorry. Because it's not like your...advances," Olivia smirked just a bit before becoming serious again, "Weren't welcome. And it's not like I, myself, hadn't wanted the exact same thing you wanted, and hadn't been planning on making the exact same moves you made."

Alex just sat silently for several seconds, her eyes staring into the eyes she'd dreamed of so many nights, her headache-hampered mind still trying to catch up and process, to wrap itself around the new reality she found herself in, and to comprehend that... that it didn't have to be just a dream anymore. And when her mind did finally catch up, finally come to that full comprehension, the tension in her shoulders eased, her face slackened, and she exhaled a breath she hadn't known she'd been holding.

Seeing the transition in the attorney's face and body, Olivia also relaxed and her lips and chin formed into a small and understanding smile as her thumb resumed the soft rubbing along the back of Alex's hand. With the truth finally out there between them now, known, spoken aloud, acknowledged, the two women continued to just stare at each other, no longer having to pretend, no longer having to suppress what they both felt, no longer having to hide from each other or from themselves, so many thoughts and emotions, memories and fantasies, uncertainties and expectations, hopes and fears, insecurities and desires, all of these things and more flaring and passing between them in those first few moments of honesty.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Finally Olivia had to look away. "Wow," she said breathlessly, the only verbal acknowledgement of the entire silent conversation that had just taken place between them.

"Yeah," Alex responded just as breathlessly, also looking away, turning her eyes down to where their two hands lay on the table. She turned hers over then, so they were now palm to palm, allowing their fingers to intertwine and mingle. Both women just watched the play and movement of their now joined hands for several seconds, marveling at the simplicity of it but also the beauty of it, both lost in thought, both wondering what to say next.

It was Alex who finally broke the silence. "Soooo," she ventured tentatively, "If *you* were, um, wanting, and I was perhaps a little too obviously wanting..." Alex peeked back up at the detective and finished her thought with a small unexpectedly impish smile of her own, "Tell me again why we didn't..."

Olivia couldn't help but exhale, chuckle, and shake her head just a little bit. Even at a time like this, in a moment like this, it was just so like Alex to pick up an argument she had lost the night before and try to win it the next morning, or if not win it, at least figure out why she had lost it so next time she'd be more prepared, god love her. So with her own little smirk, Olivia still answered sincerely, "I didn't want to take advantage of you,"

Alex looked at the detective plaintively then and continued, only half serious now, if that, "Would it have killed you to take advantage of me, Olivia? I mean, Christ! I was _throwing_ myself at you!"

Olivia out and out laughed at that, the tension of just moments before now broken, or at least subdued, happy that Alex, who was still blushing slightly but also now smiling, seemed able to laugh at herself over her actions, rather than feeling mortified by them.

But since an answer to Alex's question wasn't really expected, Olivia didn't give one, instead just smiling at the attorney as both women enjoyed the moment of levity. But as they continued to stare at each other again, and as the silence descended once more, their smiles faded and the air began to charge around them again, emotions rising, want rising, desire rising, just as before. And just as before, it was Alex who once again recovered first with a question, only this time a more serious one. She swallowed hard and took a breath. Then still staring into Olivia's eyes asked quietly, almost a whisper, "So what now?"

Olivia knew Alex was referring to the two of them, asking what they do now, where they go from here, and the detective wanted to answer, god she want to answer, with words and with actions. But unfortunately, unfortunately, that would have to wait, at least for the time being. "Now," Olivia looked at her watch then looked back at Alex regretfully, as she completed her answer, "I have to go to work."

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Alex frowned, more than a little thrown off by Olivia's unexpected answer, "Work? But it's Saturday."

"I know," Olivia said on a defeated exhale as she let go of Alex's hand and leaned back in her chair, hoping the physical distance would make it easier to say what she had to say and do what she had to do, "Elliot and Fin are catching today but something came up with one of Elliot's kids and he asked if I could cover for him. I told him I'd do my best to get in by noon."

Alex reacted strongly to mention of the time, "Noon? Crap!" She looked frantically around for a clock, "What time is it now?"

It was Olivia's turn to be thrown off by Alex's unexpected reaction, "11:15, why? Is something wrong?"

Alex relaxed marginally but groaned and rubbed her hand over her face once again, "I'm supposed to meet Serena for lunch at 12:30."

Olivia raised her eyebrows at the once again out-of-sorts attorney and playfully admonished her, "You got that smashed last night even knowing you were supposed to meet someone for lunch today? What, exactly, were you thinking?" Her voice turned even more playful and teasing, and though Alex couldn't see Olivia's face, she could hear the smile in her voice, "Or perhaps I should ask what, exactly, were you thinking with?"

Alex groaned again into her hands, "Please don't start with me again, Olivia," she put her hands down to look at and grab her coffee mug before continuing without really even thinking, "I obviously was planning to sweat out a lot of the alcohol last night but *someone* had to be all noble and not let that happen."

When Olivia didn't respond, Alex looked up from her mug to peek over at the brunette. And when she did she saw the detective looking a little stunned and lost in thought... and rather aroused. She once again reviewed in her head what she'd just said and when her mind stumbled back upon the mental images created by the phrase 'sweat out a lot of alcohol', she, too, found herself a little lost in thought and found her own arousal increasing once more. And this time it was more of a moan than a groan when she re-buried her face in her hands.

Fortunately, the sound was enough to shake Olivia out of her reverie. She inhaled deeply again and shook her head as she rose from her seat, standing and running a hand through her cropped hair, "I better get going or neither one of us will get out of here today."

Alex just nodded, her head still in her hands.

"But," Olivia said, "I'd like..." she hesitated, though not sure why. They'd both admitted to pretty much wanting to jump each other, so why was this so hard? "That is, if you're free tonight..." Olivia stumbled over her words, "I mean... well there's this restaurant..." she trailed off again.

Alex lifted her head to peer at the now bumbling detective, to find that detective looking rather bashful and unsure and not meeting her eyes. She cocked her head slightly to the side, asking quietly and with a small smile, "Are you asking me out on a date?"

Olivia shoved her hands in her pockets and still wouldn't meet the attorney's eyes, unexpectedly shy, "Yeah. Yeah, I guess I am."

Alex's heart melted just a little bit. Olivia could be so incredibly confident sometimes and so incredibly sexy for that confidence, but she could also sometimes be so incredibly insecure. And that just made her incredibly and irresistibly cute. The attorney lowered her hands completely and continued to smile at Olivia's bowed head as she replied with tenderness, gentleness, but also with absolute certainty, "I would love to go to dinner with you tonight."

Olivia peeked up, unable to keep her own smile from her face, "Yeah?"

Alex smiled back and nodded, "Yeah."

Olivia exhaled and her smile broadened. But it then suddenly disappeared as her face took on an expression of worry as she realized something, "Wait, are you sure? I mean, you'll be up for it? You'll be feeling okay? We can do it tomorrow if if you think you'd be feeling better and if you'd rather," Olivia offered in one big rush of words and concern, though she truly hoped Alex would want to go tonight.

Alex smiled at Olivia's typical selflessness and gracious offer but dismissed it, "Oh, I'll be up for it," Alex assured her. "I'll cut my lunch with Serena short so I can take a long nap this afternoon. She'll understand."

Olivia smirked and let out a small relieved sigh, "Good." She took a deep breath and not daring to stare for too long into those deep blue eyes, headed the few steps through the living room and to the front door, grabbing her coat from the wrack and putting it on as she continued speaking, "And you don't need anything else before I go?"

Alex shook her head.

"You're sure?" Olivia adjusted the coat on her shoulders, "There's still more coffee in the pot if you want more," Olivia continued in another rush of words, "And your bottle of Advil is full. I double checked."

Alex was both amused and touched by Olivia's continued concern and doting, "I'll be fine Olivia, really."

Olivia nodded and opened the front door, "You'll call me if you need anything?"

"I promise," Alex nodded.

Having run out of things to say, Olivia just stood with the front door now open, not wanting to leave but knowing she had to. "Okay then."

"Okay," Alex said in response.

The detective gave Alex one last smile mixed with equal parts regret and anticipation before stepping outside and shutting the door behind her. But just before it latched closed, she reopened it and her head poked back inside, "Seven o'clock? Tonight I mean?"

Alex smiled, her eyes even sparkling just a bit, feeling far far far better than she had all morning, "Can't wait."

Olivia just grinned and this time was out the door and gone.

Alex rubbed her face in her hands one more time and then looked at a clock. 11:25. She'd really better get moving so she could meet Serena and then get back here for that nap. She definitely needed to recover and rest up. For she had a feeling she'd be needing all her energy tonight.

So with that happy thought in mind and a small smile on her lips because of it, she took one more swig of coffee and headed to the shower.


	3. Part 3: Alex Cabot Was Hungry

**Title:** Alex Cabot Was Drunk, Part 3: Alex Cabot Was Hungry  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own SVU or these characters (darn it!) nor am I making any money off them (darn it!). No infringement intended.**  
Fandom:** Law and Order: SVU**  
Pairing:** Alex/Olivia**  
Rating: ** T/PG-13**  
Summary:** Alex and Olivia finally go on their first date**  
Notes:**  
0. As always, feedback is loved and feeds the muse. And I do reply!  
1. That's right. Alex Cabot Was Hungry. I mean, what's it taken me? A year or something? But, I figured since the New York state senate finally got their act together and made it possible for Alex and Olivia to get married (you know, if they were real and all), the *least* I could do is finally let them go on that Date I've been promising! So I put my nose to the grindstone this weekend and just got it done! You can be the judge as to whether it was worth the wait and the fuss!  
2. A most grateful and gracious shout-out to the Bananigans gang for being on my case for so long about this. It may never have been written without that! So thanks Sunny, Spoonie, Forkie, and, of course, Victor.

* * *

Alex Cabot was hungry. I mean, not, like, _famished_ or anything...

Her stomach growled. Loudly. Okay, so maybe she wasn't all that far from famished. And she really shouldn't be surprised about that. After all, she hadn't eaten in practically forever.

Well, okay, _forever_ was perhaps a slight exaggeration. But not much of one. Because she pretty much hadn't eaten all day. When she'd met Serena for lunch, she still wasn't feeling quite up to putting food in her stomach. And when she'd woken up from her nap, it was late enough that she was afraid eating something might spoil her dinner.

And she didn't want anything spoiling her dinner. For it was going to be a very special dinner.

At least she was hoping it would be a very special dinner as she contemplated herself and her outfit in her full length mirror. She turned and looked at herself over her shoulder, checking out the back of the dress. A slight flush went through her body as she admitted just how spot-on Serena had been in their earlier conversation...

_"You're calling me to ask what you should wear tonight, aren't you?" Serena's voice had sounded from the other end of the line, the other blonde attorney not even bothering to say hello when she had seen who was calling._

"Yes, I am," Alex sighed, "It's very 11th grade of me, isn't it?" she asked as she stared into her closet.

"Yes, it is. But it's cute."

"You did not just call me cute," Alex put her hand on her hip, even through Serena couldn't see her, "I have not been called 'cute' since I was six," she informed her best friend.

"Yes, yes I did just call you cute," Serena replied smoothly, "And I'm going to call you cute again because next you're going to tell me you have nothing to wear and you're going to say that's very first year law of you and then I'm going to tell you to wear that fantastic little white dress with the black stripe across the waist and you'll say you don't feel like tonight is a good night for white and I'll tell you then to wear that little red number and you'll say that's too obvious and in response I'll ask you why you called if you weren't going to take my advice and then you'll..."

"Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!" Alex finally broke in, bringing a halt to Serena's monologue. "Are you going to let me talk at all in this conversation?" Alex asked.

"No, I'm not, because this conversation will go much faster if I'm the only one speaking," Serena answered. Then before Alex could say anything more, the other blonde just stated flatly and definitively from the other end of the phone line, "Wear the black dress you bought last fall for the governor's fundraiser."

Alex snapped her mouth shut over whatever protest she might have been ready to launch into as she thought about this latest suggestion. After a second or two of silence she asked, "You don't think it's too formal?"

"If you don't wear that shawl you bought to go with it, then not at all."

Alex moved several hangers to the side as she found the garment in question and pulled it out to examine it as Serena began speaking again, "It's classy yet not stogy. And it's black so it works for all occasions." Alex held up the dress in front of her body in front of the mirror. 'Not bad,' she thought to herself as she heard Serena continue, "It's not too revealing but will show enough to distract your detective."

"Serena," Alex's voice took on a slight warning tone at her friend's last sentence, even as the attorney continued examining the dress.

But Serena was unphased, "And its cut is such that it will invite and lead that detective's eyes exactly where you want them looking."

"Serena," the threatening, unamused tone increased.

"But best of all," again Serena just ignored Alex's protestations, "And most important of all," Serena paused for effect before delivering her best reason for wearing it, "It's very easy to remove."

"Good bye, Serena," Alex responded.

"You know I'm right!" Alex heard her friend yell into the phone just before she hung up. But, Alex had to admit, Serena was... well, Serena was, in fact, right.

So an hour and a half later Alex was taking one more look at herself in the mirror, smoothing down the black dress and checking her make up as she took in a long, deep, calming breath. A breath that then seemed to go completely and utterly to waste as her heart skipped a beat and her breathing started coming faster and shallower the moment she heard the doorbell ring.

As nonchalantly as possible, trying very much to convince herself this wasn't a big deal, Alex walked to her front door, pausing there a moment to take one more breath. She then opened the door...and just about fell over.

For Olivia was standing on the other side.

And she was stunning.

Sleek slacks hugging her hips and thighs, form fitting ribbed turtle neck, short hair looking messed up but in such a perfect way, just the right amount of make-up to show off her natural and somewhat exotic beauty, and, to top it all off, that leather coat, that amazing leather coat.

In a word, gah.

And Olivia, for her part, was equally as blown away by Alex's appearance. The detective had had an opening line all prepared for when the door swung open, something witty, something disarming, something charming, but it flew right out of her mind when she caught sight of Alex. The attorney's golden hair flowing more freely than usual as it cascaded around her face, her blue eyes, not to be outdone, seemingly glowing bluer than usual. And Olivia would have loved to have been able to say those eyes are what she remained focused on.

But that would have been a lie. Because Olivia's attention definitely wandered.

But surely she couldn't be blamed for that. Surely it was the fault of the attorney's dress... Because, man, what a dress! It was short but not too short, low cut but not too low cut. Fitted but not tight, forming perfectly around each and every curve, accentuating each one while at the same time hiding them. It invited viewers to wonder what might lie underneath the material, but didn't actually show them anything...and the detective was definitely wondering.

Olivia wasn't sure how long she'd just been standing there staring at the other woman. Then again, neither was Alex. But in any case, it was Alex who recovered first.

"Nice flowers," the attorney finally said, breaking their mutual gawking, nodding towards the bouquet of flowers in Olivia's hand that Alex hadn't even noticed initially.

"Thank you," Olivia answered still distractedly. "Um, I mean," Olivia's voice grew marginally stronger as she finally snapped out of whatever trance she'd been in and finally looked at and held Alex's eyes, the detective's face open, smile touching her lips, wonderment in her eyes, "I mean you look fantastic," she stated unequivocally.

Alex blushed and looked down shyly. She didn't want to be so pleased, so affected by the compliment, but she was.

"And these are for you," Olivia just smiled wider and handed the bouquet over to the blonde.

"Thank you," Alex murmured demurely as she stepped aside. "Would you like to come in?" Olivia happily stepped inside and allowed Alex to close the door behind her. "I'm just going to put these in some water," Alex continued, "Do we have time before we head out?"

Olivia didn't immediately answer.

"Olivia?"

Olivia had to once again snap her eyes back into focus, "Hm? Oh, yes," this time it was Olivia's turn to blush slightly at being caught so obviously distracted by the vision in front of her. "Yes, we have time for that," she finally managed to answer.

Alex smiled at the detective and at the detective's reactions. "Great. I'll be just a minute." She disappeared into the kitchen, glad she wasn't the only one feeling the way she was feeling but also trying to calm her racing heart and racing nerves. So she let herself take her time getting a vase down from the cupboard, filling it with water, placing the flowers in it before finally coming back out to set the vase on the dining room table. She fluffed the flowers a bit with her hands. "They're beautiful," she said as she turned back around to face Olivia again. "Thank you," she repeated.

Their eyes met and held silently for a beat, silent words exchanged as so often happened before between them, but this time accompanied by the newly acknowledged heat that was simmering, the tension mounting slightly, the air charging minutely. Finally, Olivia's lips curved again, backing them both away from the moment and she responded warmly, "You're welcome." The detective then inhaled and tried to keep her voice light and keep their evening, their date, on track as she asked, "Are you ready?"

Alex swallowed and returned the smile as best she could with a nod. The blonde picked up her coat off the back of a chair where she'd draped it earlier and would be lying if she tried to claim her heart didn't flutter just a bit when Olivia moved quickly to help her put it on.

The elevator ride down from Alex's apartment was quiet, marked mostly by furtive glances and small smiles, both women realizing that through the heat, through the excitement, they were both also feeling the newness of what they were about to embark on, the unknown of it, the riskiness of it, and both were fairly nervous and anxious because of it; and neither was quite sure how to dissipate those feelings.

When they arrived at street level, Olivia quickly hailed a cab, another small flutter going through the attorney when the detective opened and held the door for Alex before getting in herself and giving the driver instructions.

Fortunately, during the cab ride, unlike the elevator ride, they managed some conversation. _How was lunch with Serena? Short. How was the day in the squad room? Mercifully quiet. _The regular, even if somewhat mundane, talk at least helped to break the ice and ease the tension; reminding them both that though this was a 'date' and all, though this was 'new', it was still just them, just them spending time together. And, really, they'd never had problems feeling at ease in each others presence before so why should they now?

Before too long, their respective heart rates began to come down and just about that same time they arrived at their destination, a nice little hole-in-the-wall restaurant tucked away in the middle of a block in Chelsea. They were seated immediately, even though all the other tables were full and Alex internally noted that Olivia must have called ahead. Flowers and reservations and an amazing outfit. All on short notice and all while Olivia was working, as well. Alex couldn't keep but smiling to herself; because the detective sure did know how to make a girl feel special.

But Alex didn't have long to contemplate that warm thought before the waiter was right there bringing them a basket of rolls and asking them if they would like to see the wine list. The two women glanced at each other meaningfully, thinking back to the night before, then glanced back at the waiter, "No. Thank you," they said resolutely and practically in unison. They then immediately re-caught each other's eyes and chuckled at their own responses, the reminder of how they'd gotten here serving to further ease the tension between them.

The waiter excused himself to give them some time to look at the menu. However, Alex found it difficult to concentrate on it. For, though saying no to wine was a no brainer, the attorney found herself unable to keep from eyeing the assortment of rolls and butter that sat on the table in front of her. They looked so warm, so fresh, so good, so...calories. She had enough self-awareness and self-control that she didn't want to just pounce on them all ravenous-like, but on the other hand...

When, after several long moments, Alex just kept staring longingly at the bread between them and not at the menu or at the detective, Olivia just chuckled a little more and offered quietly, "You can have one, you know."

Alex, not even realizing that though she'd managed not to inhale one, she'd nevertheless been ogling the rolls, which in some ways is just as bad, brought her eyes quickly up to Olivia's face, seeing a crooked, teasing smile on it and a little twinkle in the detective's eyes. The attorney smiled sheepishly in return. "I guess I could use a little something to eat," she said just barely above a mumble as she tentatively reached for and delicately plucked out a sourdough from the basket as well as a pat of butter.

Olivia's smile broadened as she mirrored Alex's actions, saying somewhat over-dramatically as she did, "Well, thank goodness, because I'm starving!"

And somehow, that did it; a literal breaking of bread and a metaphorical breaking of tension. Any and all awkwardness disappeared in the wake of the simple act of chowing down and sating at least one kind of hunger, both taking a moment to tear apart and down several bites of their rolls as they also finally looked over the menu.

The conversation then flowed naturally from there. From what was good on the menu to how horrible the day old donuts were at the precinct to how amazing the donuts were at the Donut Plant to how nothing could compare to fresh donuts at the cider mill in the fall to the simple pleasure of grabbing 09p0a pear cider at the farmer's market then just sitting a spell in Union Square on a Saturday afternoon, to the best places to people watch in New York, you know, when either of them could find the time.

And before they knew it they had placed their orders as they continued chatting lightly, completely wrapped up in each other and the moment, the nervousness long forgotten in the exchange of words and tales and stories, stories which had now moved on to a more personal level, Alex's early years in the DA's office and Olivia's beat cop days, and then from there...

"Did you always know you were going to be a lawyer?" Olivia asked around a bite of chicken after their dishes had arrived.

Alex quirked a quick eyebrow and dabbed her lips with her napkin, "You mean when I finally came to terms with the fact that I couldn't be a princess?" she replied teasingly.

"You mean you've actually come to terms with that?" Olivia teased back.

Alex laughed, god it felt good to laugh. It felt good to banter. It just felt good to be here. When the attorney settled down after a moment or two, she finally answered Olivia's original question, "I think I always knew I wanted to go to law school. I had always loved Grandpa's library and all his books. And I *always* loved to debate. My mom, of course, called it 'arguing' but to this day I still like to think of it as debating."

Olivia smiled softly and indulgently, imagining this young Alex the attorney was describing.

She continued, "But it wasn't until my sophomore year in college, I think, that I truly knew that I wanted to be a _trial _lawyer."

Olivia cocked her head to the side slightly, "What happened your sophomore year?"

"It was the end of the year and, don't laugh now, I had the state championships for equestrian and the final round of the Ivy League debate competition both on the same day. It was terribly stressful."

Alex looked over at Olivia who was biting her lip. Hard.

"I told you not to laugh," the attorney said mock-disapprovingly.

Olivia cracked up, she couldn't help it. "I'm sorry," she chuckled, "But 'equestrian and Ivy League debate' and you expect me not to laugh?"

Alex also chuckled at herself, "I know, I was such a cliché, wasn't I?"

"Maybe a little bit, but aren't we all?" Olivia smiled warmly, "So please continue, I can't wait to hear where this is going."

Alex took a drink of water and continued her story. "Anyway, as I was saying before being so rudely interrupted," the attorney teasingly chided, "I had both these competitions on the same day; riding first, then the final debate with just barely enough time to get from one to the other in between. And, of course, riding ran a little late. As soon as it was over, I didn't even stick around to get the final results before I jumped into my dad's car and he drove the 30 minutes back to campus with me in the back seat frantically changing, while also getting in some last minute preparation and putting the final touches on my arguments."

"It wasn't until we were practically there that I realized I didn't have a change of shoes."

Olivia raised an eyebrow.

"I, of course, completely panicked."

Olivia smiled indulgently but obviously had to tease the blonde again, "Of course! Who wouldn't?"

Alex gave the detective another dirty look, "Be nice," she admonished then continued, "Since there was little else I could do, I put my riding boots back on. I was mortified. I was going against a senior, a guy that had won the year before not to mention the fact that one of the judges was dean of the law school I wanted to go to. But, my dad reminded me of some of the lessons my grandfather had taught me. So, I walked into the debate room, two minutes before the scheduled start time for the first speaker, head held high, set down my briefcase on the table, pulled out my notes and glasses and sat down, all prim and proper, putting on a show of complete confidence, like I cut things this close all the time."

"Wait a minute," Olivia interrupted with a slight frown, "Aren't riding boots usually knee high?"

Alex smiled a little shyly at the memory and nodded her head, "That they are. Black. Leather. And knee high."

Olivia began to smile, getting more and more curious about this story, "So what happened?" she prompted.

"Well," Alex picked up where she'd left off, "It was clear the judges were displeased with my tardiness and that my opponent was laughing at me. I was informed that since I wasn't present for the coin toss to determine who went first, that I forfeited it, meaning I had to go first and that my time started in...and the judge looked at his watch...30 seconds. So I rose from my seat and went to the podium. I then calmly explained to them..."

"Oh, this is going to be good..." Olivia interrupted, completely engrossed in the story.

"...I explained to them," Alex repeated, "That I had been in an equestrian competition earlier that day that had been delayed due to an injured horse. That I was very sorry about my inappropriate footwear but that I knew how much value they, as educators, placed on well-roundedness and preparedness; so that I trusted that the substance of what had to say and the skill with which I said it was far more important and would carry far more weight with them than a minor breach in attire etiquette."

"You challenged them; putting the impetus on them to make sure they didn't hold it against you, and probably even making them go so far as to favor you more," Olivia clarified admiringly.

"You bet I did," Alex nodded, "One of the lessons grandpa taught me: look for ways to turn disadvantages into advantages. So, after that, I simply put my glasses on, and told them I was ready to proceed."

Olivia's eyes glazed over slightly, "So let me get this straight. You were wearing a blouse, skirt, knee high black leather boots and your glasses?"

Alex smirked, knowing where Olivia's mind was going, "That's correct."

"And then I bet you made one hell of an argument on top of that," Olivia prompted.

"Yes, I did, if I do say so myself," Alex smiled. "I was feeling rather brazen, pumped up on adrenaline and feeling like I really had nothing to lose at that point. So, instead of starting with my arguments, I threw caution and convention to the wind and began with all the counter arguments, stating right from the onset what my opponent was going to argue and then stating why each of those arguments fell short."

"Another lesson from your grandfather?" Olivia guessed.

Alex nodded again, "Never be afraid to address the weakest parts of your case," Alex quoted her grandfather proudly. The attorney then wrapped up her story with a shrug, "By the time I finished, I knew the risk had been worth it; that I had impressed the judges and thrown my opponent for a loop. And when it was over and I was announced as the winner...what a rush. I knew right then I wanted to be a trial lawyer and I also knew that I'd work my ass off..."

"To make sure you always won," Olivia finished Alex's sentence with a sly smile.

"To make sure justice was always done," Alex corrected with a small challenging smile of her own.

Olivia chuckled at the correction, "Well, thank god you're on our side!"

Alex returned the light laughter and accepted Olivia's warm smile. Together they let their merriment and the merriment of the moment linger for as long as possible before it faded slowly and a bit grudgingly, both taking a sip of water as transition, both feeling the mood shift slightly, both, perhaps, knowing what was coming next. For after Olivia had asked Alex if she'd always wanted to be a lawyer, there was really only one appropriate and corresponding question to ask in return, even if the answer, or at least the history behind the answer, was already mostly known.

Still, for a variety of reasons, Alex felt compelled to ask. So, taking a deep breath and letting her face settle into an appropriately more sober expression, she went forward with it.

"What about you?" she asked it quietly.

Olivia's only response was a raising of her eyebrows.

"Did you always know this was what you wanted to do?" Alex expanded her question, just as quietly, the tone of her voice indicating that, yes, yes, she knew exactly what she was asking, and she knew Olivia's answer would not be as funny or happy or carefree as Alex's. But more importantly, she wanted Olivia to know she knew and she also wanted Olivia to know that it was okay. That it didn't scare her. That she was there to listen if Olivia wanted to talk.

Olivia's expression became more sober then, as well, her smile fading slowly but completely as she held Alex's gaze for a moment. She then looked down and reached out one hand in front of her, letting it rest palm up on the table about halfway between them, the request clear.

Alex's stomach flipped just a bit as she understood the request. She mirrored Olivia's actions, reaching out, as well, and taking the offered hand.

Olivia's fingers closed over Alex's and she kept her gaze down on their now intertwined hands. She rubbed her thumb slowly back and forth across Alex's skin, obviously thinking, obviously considering. Alex could feel her stomach continuing to flip and could feel her heart pounding, knowing that she had taken a chance in asking, but feeling, believing, knowing, she would have been taking a bigger chance in not asking.

Finally Olivia looked up, once again meeting Alex square in the eye. She paused just another second before responding, only barely above a whisper, "Not tonight," she tightened her grip just slightly on Alex's hand, "Okay?" her eyes pled with the attorney to understand, "Not tonight," she repeated simply.

Alex quietly exhaled the breath she didn't even know she'd been holding. For she did understand. Olivia wasn't shutting her out, wasn't telling her never, wasn't running from her or from the past or from anything, really. Quite the opposite, in fact. Olivia was promising that she _would_ talk about it, that she'd tell Alex whatever Alex wanted to know, maybe even _wanted_ to tell her. But just... just not tonight.

And Alex didn't blame her. Actually, part of her was even a bit relieved. She would have gladly sat there and listened for as long as Olivia wanted to talk. But, considering this technically was still just their first date, perhaps that topic _was_ a little heavy.

So Alex smiled a small, understanding smile and nodded once, "Okay," she whispered back and gave Olivia's hand a squeeze of her own, indicating not only that she really, truly did understand, but also that she was grateful for Olivia's openness and honesty, and would be there when Olivia was ready.

In return, Olivia's lips and chin formed into an expression of gratitude as she held Alex's gaze another long moment and gave the attorney's hand one more squeeze. She then inhaled deeply and let her face transform into a much lighter expression, a smile forming at the corners of her lips and her eyes dancing a bit more as she changed the topic smoothly, transitioning them gently back into the lighter mood of just moments before. "Ask me something else, instead."

Alex exhaled again and let her own smile and attitude lighten, as well, both women pulling their hands back and picking up their forks. "Okay, tell me about..." Alex took a bite of her dinner as she thought, chewing and narrowing her eyes as if she were concentrating very hard and considering very carefully what she would ask. "Alright," she swallowed, "Tell me about the first time you met... John."

"John?" Olivia's surprise at the unexpected end to that question had her coughing slightly on the food in her mouth. She quickly swallowed and wiped her mouth before explaining why she'd reacted as such, "I was sure you were going to ask me the first time I met Elliot. But John? Why John?"

Alex shrugged, delighted with Olivia's reaction, "What can I say? Sometimes I just like to be unpredictable. And maybe I also like trying to keep you on your toes," she said with a grin.

Olivia raised an eyebrow. "Unpredictable and keeping me on my toes, hm?" she almost leered.

Alex just smiled and returned Olivia's cocked eyebrow, trying to keep the slight blush from coloring her neck over Olivia's insinuations, but knowing she wasn't entirely successful.

Olivia chuckled and shook her head as she took a drink of water. "Okay," she got back on track, putting her water back down, "The first time I met John. Well, it was my second day with the squad, as it turns out. We exited the Captain's office – 'we' being the Captain, Elliot, and myself, and what do you know, we practically ran right into John who was just coming into the squad room after a day off. Cap'n stopped him and introduced me, explaining I was the newest member of the team and that I would be partnered with Elliot."

"Uh-huh" Alex made an unconscious sound indicating she was following, though it was unnecessary since her bright eyes and rapt gaze indicated the same.

Olivia got a slight smile on her face as she recalled and related the next events, "John gave me this openly appraising look. I mean, he didn't even hide the fact that he was giving me a good once over. He even took a step back so he could look me head to toe and believe me, his eyes lingered more than once," Olivia shook her head at the memory. "Then, when he had apparently finished this inspection, he dramatically held out his hand to shake mine and said, again _sooo _blatant, "Very nice to meet you. I had no idea they grew cops so breathtakingly beautiful up here in New York. Drinks after work tonight?"

"He did not!" Alex exclaimed.

Olivia nodded, almost chuckling, shaking her head at the memory, "Yes, he did. I didn't know if he was actually coming on to me, if he was really being sexist, if I should take offense, or if this was just some initiation to see how the thick the new girl's skin was and how well she could run with the boys."

"So what did you do or say back?" Alex asked, unknowingly leaning slightly forward in her seat now, anxiously awaiting the rest of the story.

Olivia shrugged as she took another drink of water, then finished with a smirk, "I gave him an equally appraising look up and down before taking his hand and returning the handshake, telling him that I had no idea they grew cops so breathtakingly ugly down there in Baltimore. And thanks, but no, I had to clean my gun after work."

Alex threw her head back, clapping her hands once together and laughing at the punch line of the story. "Perfect!" she exclaimed.

Olivia grinned, "I thought so, too." The detective then shrugged, "And from that moment, a beautiful friendship was born."

Both women chuckled at that, knowing that what Olivia had said was meant to be funny, and, in fact, was funny, but also knowing that it was true.

Alex knew that John and Olivia were actually quite close, that all of them were, really; that the squad had become something of a surrogate family for the detective, a family that welcomed her with open arms, and one she was eternally grateful for. And, even better, the feelings were mutual.

So as they once again quieted from their laughter, Alex spoke of the truth behind Olivia's words, referring to the entire squad as she said quietly, meaningfully, eyes and expression warm, "You're all very lucky to have found each other."

Olivia's expression became somewhat more thoughtful as she met and held Alex's gaze. She nodded slowly, acknowledging what Alex was speaking of, "Yes, we are," she replied. Then, after several more seconds of silence, she then acknowledged something more, repeating and expanding her previous response, "We really are."

Alex could feel the flush along her skin and had to look away, knowing Olivia was no longer referring to just the squad but was also referring to her, as well, and the honesty of Olivia's eyes and statement had sent Alex's stomach fluttering again as it had several times that night. The attorney took a moment to clear her throat and take a drink in an effort to calm her body's response, before finally replying, backing away just slightly from the moment with self-deprecating humor, "Oh, yeah, I'm sure last night you all felt *so* lucky to have me there."

Olivia gave the attorney a tender but slightly amused look, recognizing Alex's desire to continue to keep things light, and happily willing to indulge that desire, so she responded teasingly, "Well, yeah, after that Judge Waylen story you told us, we definitely loved having you there!"

Alex wanted to chuckle but could do nothing but groan, instead, at the mention of the telling of that tale so Olivia just smiled. When she continued, it was with a little more sincerity, "Seriously, Alex," Olivia waited until the attorney looked up again and met her eye before going on, "We talked about this this morning, didn't we? There's no need to worry or apologize. We were both thinking and wanting the same thing and both planning to make the same sort of moves, so though I can't speak for the guys," Olivia's voice dropped even more as she concluded, "Let me assure you, 'lucky' was pretty much exactly how I was feeling."

Alex melted at the detective's words and as they held each other's gazes, basking again in the warm feelings they both felt. But despite those warm feelings, Alex wasn't ready, wasn't quite ready for the growing intensity to boil over, not yet. She'd get there, she'd be ready eventually, but right then, she wanted this light banter to continue for a little while longer. Besides, they weren't quite done with dinner yet.

So she, like Olivia before, kept her voice light. "You know," she finally broke eye contact briefly to fiddle with her napkin before looking back up, "You keep saying you had been planning on making the same sort of moves, but I bet you would have actually made them sooooo much better than I did," she finished with a slight twinkle in her eye.

Olivia appreciated the sentiment and recognized the lightness in Alex's tone, so just responded with a slightly cocked eyebrow and a small shake of her head, "Oh, I wouldn't be too sure about that."

"No, I'm sure," Alex replied with conviction but playfulness, fleshing out and getting into this new strand of the conversation, "You would have been all smooth and suave and urbane and completely swept me off my feet." Alex nodded to emphasize the certainty behind her statements.

Olivia couldn't help chuckle but also couldn't help but be a _little_ embarrassed by Alex's continued assertions and she knew she was just barely blushing through her smile and through her question back to Alex, "And why do you assume that?"

Alex saw the blush on Olivia's cheeks, light as it was, and the detective's mild embarrassment only encouraged Alex, "Oh come on," the attorney looked Olivia dead in the eye and said so very matter-of-factly, "Everyone knows you got game."

Olivia threw her head back and laughed, I mean, how could one not after hearing that come out of Alex's mouth? I mean, was it possible that Alex was somehow still a little drunk from the night before what with throwing around street talk like that? Olivia shook her head in mild disbelief, "Oh, I 'got game', do I" she finally managed to parrot Alex's phrase back at her, "And this is something everyone knows, too?"

Alex grinned at Olivia's continued reactions and nodded back twice.

Olivia finally calmed down enough to consider her next response. She looked Alex in the eyes before finally answering, quietly, but still with a little smile, "Well, sometimes I get thrown off that game."

"I doubt that very much," Alex responded still egging Olivia on a bit.

Olivia looked away then and wouldn't meet Alex's eyes. She shrugged, trying to be casual but unable to hide the raw honesty of her words, "It's true. Some people..." she paused and her voice dropped further, "Some *one* tends to throw me off it sometimes."

Alex melted. Again. Once again that combination of incredible confidence mixed with those streaks of insecurity...god, they were truly Alex's undoing. However, the attorney was on a roll now and she wouldn't be deterred, so she happily went in this new direction with Olivia while also continuing to tease the detective, "Oh, really? And who might that some *one* be?"

Olivia looked up finally and gave Alex a dry look, rising this time to the challenge, bantering back, "Fishing for compliments, are we now?"

The attorney smiled back and shrugged, "What can I say? I had a rough night last night. There was this woman I've been fantasizing about for a long time and she kept turning down my advances," Alex answered still matter-of-factly and playfully.

Olivia lifted an eyebrow, trying to maintain a straight face but having trouble keeping the delighted smile from her lips, "Fantasizing, huh? And for how long did you say?"

Alex set her lips and returned Olivia's earlier dry look, "Now who's fishing for compliments?"

Olivia responded in kind, shrugging and still smiling a little smile, "Hey, I had a rough night, too. This beautiful woman kept coming on to me and I had to keep saying no. Believe me, it was *not* easy!"

It was Alex's turn to blush a bit, not just at the memories of her actions from the night before, but also at Olivia calling her beautiful, that one simple word causing an unexpected thrill to course through her and she found herself wishing Olivia would say it again.

Olivia just smiled at the blush she saw rising on Alex's neck, feeling the same warmth internally that Alex was showing externally, basking in and enjoying their little bit of verbal tennis. But after a few moments of letting the good natured teasing and good feeling settle in silence over the table, Alex looked back up and looked into Olivia's eyes. And like several other times that evening they allowed themselves to just stare at each other for several long seconds.

Olivia then reached a hand across the table again and waited for Alex to take it. And when she did, the detective once again rubbed her thumb along the back of it, looking down at their joined hands briefly and then back up, before asking quietly, "Really, for how long?"

Alex regarded Olivia for a moment and contemplated her answer, her heart beating a little harder, her stomach almost in a constant flutter now, and she knew it was from excitement, yes, but also from nerves over admitting just how long it had been. So even though she knew it was a bit of a cop out, her reply was, "Okay, but you first."

Olivia cocked an eyebrow slightly and peered into Alex's eyes, reading the blonde, puzzling out the hidden meaning behind Alex's request. And whether she figured it out or not, either way, Olivia leaned back, releasing Alex's hand and taking a deep breath. "Okay," she said, her face relaxing and a slight smile creeping back onto it. "You were wearing this beige skirt and jacket, with a crisp white shirt underneath," Olivia's eyes took on a slightly far away look as she conjured up the memory in her mind, "The shirt was unbuttoned probably one more button than was strictly proprietary, yet it still seemed completely professional. Your hair was a little shorter than it is now, maybe shoulder length. You came click-clacking down the hall with your heels, and your briefcase over your shoulder and your glasses perched on your nose and you entered the squad room at Captain Cragen's side, back straight, shoulders square, chin up, no fear."

"I mean, you must have known we weren't exactly happy about your presence, and in fact, known that 'we weren't exactly happy' was a huge understatement. The whole squad, all of us, we were already so pissed at the world and by proxy so pissed at you." Alex was frowning as Olivia spoke, trying to picture the scene in her head, trying to place exactly what point in time Olivia was talking about.

But she didn't say anything so Olivia continued her description, "So, yeah, we were more than a little standoffish with you. Yet every veiled comment from us, every gauntlet we threw down, you never let it phase you. Your face registered the fact that you'd heard it, understood it, processed it, but it just didn't seem to bother you. You stayed on task, got the update on the case from us, commended us - _commended us _for Christ's sake - on our progress so far on the Croft investigation and assured us you would do everything in your power to clear whatever roadblocks we might run into as we proceeded."

That's when Alex finally spoke up. "Croft..." she repeated the most pertinent part of Olivia's monologue, "You're talking about the Radial Velocity case, aren't you?"

Olivia nodded slowly, letting the implications settle in with Alex.

And settle in they did. "You're... you're talking about the very first time we ever met," Alex correctly concluded.

Olivia just nodded again then continued, "I wanted to hate you, god I wanted to hate you. After the Morris Commission, we all did. But what I was feeling, how I was reacting..." Olivia's expression was a mixture of shy yet sly, embarrassed yet impish, and she looked down and away, "Well, let's just say it wasn't hate."

She glanced back up to find Alex smiling back at her. And that smile encouraged her and emboldened her, giving her the strength to finish, "You were nothing that I expected; nothing at all. You were so... obviously strong and obviously competent and obviously fair and so overwhelmingly..." Olivia just shook her head, swept up once again in her initial reaction. Finally she gave up trying to put that initial reaction into words and just shrugged, "And so I just sat there like a bratty two-year-old, sulking behind my desk, shooting daggers at you with my eyes, giving curt answers, pretending to despise you or at least not give a rip about you, hoping to mask how I was really feeling and how I was really reacting." Olivia looked away again then, blushing at the length and depth of her admission.

However, when Alex didn't speak, Olivia, with a little trepidation, finally looked up and looked across at her. And once again found encouragement.

"So," Alex had a teasing lilt to her voice and a teasing twinkle in her eye, "You're saying it was my strength, competence, and fairness that you admired from the start?"

Olivia couldn't help but laugh, not for the first time that night, any uncertainty that might have begun to build while she spoke and revealed herself dissipated, and she could feel herself blushing again, this time at Alex's all too accurate teasing, "Uh, right. Your strength, competence, and fairness. Among, you know, maybe a few other things," the detective admitted with that sly shy smile.

"Mhm," Alex continued to smile at Olivia's mild embarrassment and squirming.

But, turn about was fair play. So Olivia, in short order, cleared her throat, her portion of the confession over and now ready to hear Alex's. "Alright, alright, enough about me," Olivia waved her hands mock-dismissively, and then cocked a quick challenging eyebrow at Alex, "Your turn. So fess up. How long has it been for you?"

Alex felt her heart skip a beat and she took a deep breath, knowing there was no getting out of this. Though, really, there wasn't any reason anymore to even try to. So she related her part of the story much the same way as Olivia had, "You were in the interrogation room. You were talking to a young man, encouraging him to admit to circumstances that would explain and mitigate his own actions. And... there was just something about your voice, something about your posture, something about the way you interacted with him." Alex took another deep breath, "And, well, maybe also something about the way you filled out the jeans you were wearing as you bent over the table to talk to him."

Like Olivia, Alex could feel herself blushing slightly and she knew if she looked at Olivia right then she'd blush even more. So she kept her gaze averted as she continued, "I knew I needed to concentrate, but my mind just kept wandering, and I'd _never_had so much trouble keeping my mind from wandering like that before. So I tried to buckle down, tried my best, not entirely successfully, but I tried, to focus not on you but on the intricacies of the case being discussed and on the young man you were talking to." Finally Alex looked up to meet Olivia's gaze for the important part of her revelation, "A young man named Michael Goren."

Realization dawned on Olivia's face. "Wait... you're talking about the same case, maybe a day or two later."

Alex nodded, "The second time we met," she confirmed.

Silence yawned between them as they just stared at each other one more time, realizing and accepting and marveling over the fact that the attraction to each other had not only been mutual but had been, for all intents and purposes, immediate. For both of them.

That they'd both wanted each other pretty much right from the start.

The key part of that being _pretty much_ right from the start... but not _exactly _right from the start, at least not for one of them.

And that was a distinction Olivia was not about to pass up pointing out.

So, continuing in the same vein of keeping things light and teasing, Olivia cleared her throat and found her voice. "Well, I'm a little hurt," the detective tried to suppress her smile and actually sound hurt, but wasn't entirely successful as she continued, "I mean, it took you _twice_ as long to start fantasizing about me as it took for me to start fantasizing about you!"

It was Alex's turn to laugh out loud at Olivia's words, "What do you mean twice as long?" she asked through the laughter, trying to defend herself, "It was the second time we met!"

"Right," Olivia answered back, "And for me it was the _first_ time we met. See? Twice as long!"

Alex tried to give Olivia a dirty look across the table but was pretty much failing miserably at it. She did, however, manage to keep up the repartee, "Well, fine, but can you really blame me? I mean, you just admitted that you were openly hostile, sulking, hiding behind your desk and giving me the stink eye. So, gee, I'm sorry for not wanting to jump your bones right then and there."

Good lord, if Olivia had been drinking anything, she would have spit it out. I mean, _god_, the things coming out of Alex's mouth tonight! "'Stink eye'?" the detective finally choked out a reply, "'Stink eye?" she repeated.

Alex lifted her chin, affecting a faux-haughty attitude, "Yes, 'stink eye'. That was one of my grandfather's favorite expressions and it perfectly describes how you were looking at me. And, believe it or not, it wasn't your most alluring look. At least at the time it wasn't."

Olivia just continued to chuckle and shake her head in amusement, but also, in acknowledgement that Alex did have a point.

When they both quieted down and a modicum of seriousness returned, they yet again just stared at each other for long seconds, both lost in the memories of everything that had happened between those first two fateful meetings, all the opportunities that had come and gone, all the chances that were missed. Both wondering why it had taken so long, but with the warm glow in both of their guts, both feeling exceptionally grateful – and, yes indeed, lucky – that they'd finally made it from there to here.

And who knows what might have happened next if their moment hadn't been interrupted by the rather untimely appearance of the waiter. Both women leaned back in their seats and caught there breaths. Somewhere in all their chatter and banter, they'd managed to finish their meals and empty their plates.

"Can I interest either of you in dessert tonight?" the waiter innocently asked.

Both women looked back at each other briefly, both wondering if the other was thinking about the kind of dessert they were thinking of and both desperately suppressing yet another flush over the thought. But, with a small shake of the head from Alex, Olivia turned back to the waiter. "No, but thank you. I think we're set," the detective answered for them both.

"Very well," the waiter replied with a slight bow, "Gave a good evening, ladies, and thank you for coming in." And with that the waiter walked away.

Alex frowned. "Don't we need the check?" she asked confusedly as she watched the waiter retreat from view. When the attorney finally turned back towards an up until that point silent Olivia, it was to find a small sly smile once again on the lips of the detective.

"Already taken care of," Olivia said simply.

Alex looked at her momentarily, taking a moment to realize that Olivia must have also arranged payment when she made reservations or something like that. And when she did realize that, she leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms, pinning Olivia with a look, and just stating, "See what I mean? Game."

Olivia laughed out loud at that, god, she couldn't remember the last time she'd laughed this much in one evening, and just shook her head, not really a denial. She rose from her chair and moved quickly to pull Alex's seat out and help her rise, as well. She then helped Alex into her jacket and led the attorney from the restaurant.

Out on the side walk, there could have been a moment of awkwardness as both women took in a deep breath of fresh air. But the good times and good feelings were still flowing, the waiter's earlier interruption only pausing but not halting their deepening interactions. Olivia turned towards Alex and caught the attorney's eye. They smiled at each other and took another step closer.

Alex wasn't sure if Olivia was going to ask her how dinner was, compliment her, say good night to her, or kiss her, and she waited with baited breath as Olivia looked down at the side walk and then back up.

"Can I see you home?" the detective finally asked simply, quietly.

Alex's heart fluttered in her chest again and she had to struggle to contain her excitement as she replied, "I'd like that."

Olivia smiled tenderly before turning towards the street, raising her hand when she saw an approaching empty cab. When it stopped, she repeated her actions from the very beginning of the date, opening and holding the door, helping Alex in, then getting in behind her, listening to Alex give her address to the cabbie. The difference this time was when Alex settled back into the seat, Olivia reach over and took her hand.

They smiled at each other again, Olivia trying desperately to keep her own expectations in check. She suspected that Alex wanted this evening to end exactly as Olivia wanted it to, but she also wanted to respect whatever the attorney's wishes might be.

So she took a deep breath and gave their joined hands a squeeze before looking back at Alex. And looking into those blue depths, she realized that she hoped this date wouldn't end any time soon, but that even if it did, even if it ended right now, or ended at the curb in front of Alex's building, or even at the front door to Alex's apartment, this was still, already, by far, the best date she'd ever had.

Anything more would just be icing on the cake.


End file.
